There is an inherent risk that you run when you begin blogging. There is always a chance that something you say will offend somebody. In some cases something you say is misinterpreted and sometimes people simply disagree with your opinions.
A couple days ago I wrote about my grandfather dying. I am still very sad about it and I think about him everyday. I love Grampa very much and I wish I had a chance to see him one more time.
In my post, I had mentioned that he had been “passed around” amongst his children and that he was sometimes difficult to care for. Maybe it was a poor choice of words (Did I mention that I am not good with words? Maybe I should express myself with numbers.) but I only meant to convey that he was a bit of a nomad, a wanderer, someone who was always between homes. The fact that he was difficult sometimes was the truth. Anybody is who has those kinds of health problem brings on new burdens. It is one of those difficulties of life. However, despite the burdens, my family gladly bore them.
The whole family loves him very much. “Passing him around” between the siblings made it possible for each one of them to share the load when it was difficult but also share those last days with their father. I only wish I was closer so that I could have jumped into that game of catch.
I’m not sure what to say if people are still offended. I meant no offense. I wasn’t sure what I wanted to say before because the news was very numbing. I am still not sure how to feel but I felt I should honor my granfather with a post and I am sorry that I came woefully short. Please forgive me and I am sorry that nothing I say can do his life justice.
–Ries, still misses his Grampa
Hey, Ries.
I’m sorry people jumped on you. I know you loved your grandpa and you may remember how much I loved mine. When he died and I couldn’t go home for the funeral, I was crushed but I asked you guys to give the old guy a sendoff he would have appreciated and we all drank to him on New Years Eve. That meant a lot to me and made me feel like less of a heel for not spending the huge amount of money it would have taken to fly home for his funeral. What matters more is that your loved ones know that you love them and they can hold that in their hearts as they pass on. I’m sure Grampa Jack knew.
The great thing about humans is that we were given free will…including the freedom to think, feel, and express whatever comes to the mind or heart. If anyone has cared for an ailing family member, they will understand that it is difficult no matter the circumstance and there is a need for respite. Our family did an extraordinary job of caring for both Granny & Grandpa, moreso than many families I have seen in my work, and for that, I am proud, and they should be commended. That being said, there should be no need for apology or concern about offending anyone. Let’s remember this is not about us, it is about Grandpa.
Ries,
i didnt get to read this blog before you fixed it but i think you dont need to worry and apoligise for offending anyone. none of the immediate family was offended that i know of, and we all got what you were trying to say, and like Katy said our family did a great job caring for both our grandparents, and people who have no idea of what went on have no right to be offfended. my love goes to you and the family (p.s.) i am bad with words as well
love you and hope you are well
noel
Howdy, Noel. Happy to see you in these parts. I hope all is well with you.
Noel, I never actually changed my post, this was simply an additional post to clarify statements.
My original post about Grampa is still up and I have no intention of taking it or any future post down.
I am a strong advocate of free speech. I think some people forget that means we also have a responsiblity to grow thick skin because you are not going to agree with everything other people say.
That is easy to say but not as easy to practice. I admit to being a little perturbed when I heard that people were offended at my attempt at a tribute. But that is fine, I decided I would further clarify what I said so there is no confusion. If people were still upset (which I don’t believe they are) then it is not my concern because my only crime was sharing my thoughts.
Your grandpa and grandma were loved by many. Growing up in Greentown, your family means the world to me. Since your mom and I stay in touch, I was so glad that you had posted about your Grandpa’s passing so that I could immediately call your mom and catch them before they got on the plane.
Believe me, it takes a strong family to take care of aging parents and your family did an outstanding job. Thank goodness that you could post honestly and openly.
Your grandparents will be greatly missed. May your memories of them be very special to you. God Bless!
Sharon Weisel